Saturday, October 5, 2019

Loss


                                             
I recently was informed of the death of someone very dear to me.  I didn't realize until I heard the news,  just how dear she was.    It's unfortunate now days that when someone has been ill for some time and they pass you are grieved, but not surprised.  In some cases you are relieved that their suffering is over.    It's not ever easy to accept a death, but it's harder when it is unexpected.  When there is no warning.  When there is no chance to say goodbye.

Our friendship started back when my daughter was about 13 and wrote to a number of pen pals in England.  One particular young man wrote back,  and the rest is history.   I only met her once, but over the years she and her family became my family.   My daughter spent time with them when she was on an Exchange,  and after my husband died a few years later,  we took a trip to the UK and I finally got a chance to meet the family.

In the early days there were lots and lots of hand-written letters.  Pages and pages of news!  And then....there was Facebook -  and well - then came postings and messenger.  I rather missed the letters and still wrote in cards, but for the most part we kept in touch by messenger.   Of course the time difference played a big part in not catching up as much since we hardly got to be on at the same time anymore.  But I did look forward to the posts, pictures, and messages.

Over the past two weeks I have gone back over the posts, and messenger  - delighting again in our conversations and wishing there had been more.     I still laugh at her admonishing me for watching an English Soap-opera (Eastenders) as the "most depressing soap-opera on the telly",  and I think of her every time I watch "Somewhere in Time" or see a picture of George Clooney. 

We've talked books, politics, movies and family.  I watched her family grow into fine, talented men and women.  I did envy the time she had to spend with her children, since my own daughter and son-in-law are stationed across the country and I only get to see them once a year if I'm lucky.  I loved to hear about her trips to Paris (she's the one who told me I would love it there), and was very happy that she had a chance to (hopefully) cuddle her latest grandchild. 

I was fortunate to have crossed paths with her.  I can only imagine what more she could have added to my own life if there wasn't an ocean between us.   

Don't put off telling someone you care.   Take the time.  Tell them.  Show them.  Life is short - there is no guarantee for tomorrow.