The United States Post Office

I have been trying to keep a Positive attitude this new year (which is probably why I haven't written) but it has been very hard.  Major calamities don't seem to rattle me as much as the little things - probably why someone wrote that book "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" ?  But this small stuff just put me over the moon.......

I purchased some Valentines Day cards and seeing that one for my daughter & her husband required "extra postage" I decided it would be best just to go to the post office and mail it from there and purchase a book of stamps while I was at it.  I love cards - sending e-mail greetings and E-Cards is fun, but it's just not the same as a paper card in hand.  It tells the person you thought enough to read thru dozens and pick that one out personally for them.  Not the same as pointing and clicking.  Anyway, I digress. 

Have you ever stood in line at the Post Office on a Saturday morning before a holiday?   HA!  Let me tell you..........20 minutes in line, but I'm a people watcher so it did have its amusements.  When I get to the counter the woman tells me she is "NEW".  That SHOULD have told me something, but I was caffeine deprived having hit the Post Office before WAWA.  OK - I'm not mailing a package - I have 3 envelopes - should be easy.  One will require 2 stamps.  Not rocket science.  She says "this is only an ounce - doesn't require extra postage".....that's when the little siren went off in my head.  Maybe the card manufacturer had a typo on the envelope and it didn't require extra postage.  After all  I am AT the Post Office - they should KNOW.  Right?  Wrong......

Flash forward 9 days.....NINE DAYS.......card finally arrives......with 20 Cent postage due.    Well not actually FLASH forward .   Can someone explain to me how it took 9 days to get to my Daughter's door and have someone ask for 20 cents?  Nine days?  Did it sit in the post office in Stafford Virginia in a postage due pile that they only look at once a week?  Maybe every other Monday?  I can not fathom how it took 9 days.  

See - that's what I mean about the small stuff .  I think I just don't have patience for people who don't take price in the job (no matter how small).  I don't have patience for ignorance - unfortunately, you just can't help stupid I'm afraid. 

Oh well......wondering now when UPS or Fed X will come up with something to counter-act the mail.   Think of all the new jobs it would create.

GONE BUT NEVER FORGOTTEN

 TNT CARMEL COVERED KOKO

 September 8, 2003 ----- October 27, 2011

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

 Sadly Missed............................

 

Till we meet again...........................

Helpless

That pretty much describes my state of mind these past two weeks.  Helpless to be able to DO anything to help Carmel.  Look at that face.......

THIS IS CARMEL

 

Carmel has a heart murmur.  We found out how bad of a murmur by seeing a Doggie Cardiologist.  It didn't take long after discovering this,  that she had to go on heart medication, diuretics,

and  special "cough" pills.   A regular little pharmacy starting up in the kitchen!

Just when I thought we had one thing under control,  poor little Carmel has started to have seizures.   Unless you have ever experienced it,  I can't begin to explain the sheer terror I felt when I heard her cry out.   Helpless.......no other word.  

Upside - all her tests are clean - they can't explain why seizures happen really.  They just do.  I have begun searching the web and hopefully will be able to find others to talk to who are going thru the same thing.  The one site I found is really very helpful - http://www.canine-epilepsy.com/Graves.html  it reiterated everything the Vet said to me but having it in writing to LOOK at every time I need reassurance is a blessing.  

So.....a week on the new meds and everything is looking good.  She's perking up and acting more like the old Carmel going out grazing in the grass with Gaston.

And then we hit the brick wall and the seizures start again.  And it's time to up the dosage and spin the wheel to see if this works and for how long since there is no real "cure".  Hopefully we can find the right cocktail for Carmel so these seizures become less frequent.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why am I back?

I can't believe it's been as long as it has since I've written.   It's even harder to believe people have actually asked me when I was going to get back at it again.  You would think that after a year there would be so much to say.  Let's see....oh yeah, I was fired from my job of 16 years for insubordination.  Only took them 16 years to come up with that?  In the state of Pennsylvania is OK to fire someone without any reason actually.  For those that wanted to know.....let's just say that if your boss trashes you to vendors/clients/customers in correspondence and you have the audacity to confront them, THAT is called insubordination and grounds to be fired.

Actually it was a major relief once the compensation started and my financial state was put in order.  I no longer purchased Tylenol in the 500 count bottles and to say that it really felt like a weight (STRESS) was lifted off my shoulders is an understatement.  How many people out there are working in jobs that they like but with people/for people that don't appreciate what you do ?  How many people are working 50-60 hours a week and not getting so much as a thank you ?  Do you work someplace where if you don't eat lunch in the lunchroom you are the topic at lunch?  Do you work with someone whose head is so far up the managers ass they see thru one set of eyes?  Are you part of the "in" crowd.?   How many of you have heard how Lucky you are to have a job ?

Well listen up.....if that's the kind of job you have you are not so lucky.  Lucky is getting the hell out!

You've heard the old cliche - when one door closes another one opens - and even if it doesn't open right away, it does open.  And I can honestly say the air on this side of the door is so much fresher!

My head is clear again and hopefully I won't make the same mistakes thinking the people I work with are more than just associates.  Keeping my "first impression" sense about me I will try not to get involved in the Drama that is the workplace.

First Impressions NOT always lasting

I have always been guided by my first impressions because they have normally been on the money.  In my personal life that is the case - I didn't always follow my own instincts, but in the end was always right.    Unfortunately there are times when people just let you down - and that has nothing to do with first impressions.  Maybe it just has to do with people not living up to your expectations.    Sometimes you need to lower your expectations! 


In business I've found that's the case.  Not everyone has the same work ethic as you do so it's not fair to judge everyone by the same "yardstick" so to speak (or should I say light meter?)?    I think we find after working with people (co-workers, customers) that that yardstick has gotten much shorter for the most part and it's much easier to get along. 


Of course there are those FEW that will continue to be assholes - but they are the exception to the rule.

CLOSURE

It's a new year. Hell - it's BEEN a new year hasn't it? I've been trying to put the past year behind, but here it is another new year and the same crap boggles my mind - keeps me awake when I can't sleep. I woke the other night and started thinking about the same old story that haunted me last year. Not just me - everyone it touched at work and beyond. So, I am going to excise my demons - put it right out here.......so here is an open letter I wrote to the person back in July 2009 but never sent. Maybe if it is in the open it will go away and people won't think we are demons for what we did and how we treated people..........

An open letter *****

It’s after midnight again and I’m not able to sleep. Tonight I got a call from your Mother asking me what is going on. Why should I have to explain to her what is going on with you? You did not care to return any phone calls or e-mail so what’s to tell. Let me tell you what I did tell her………….I started with the story I was told and what I came to find out…..

10:45 AM……Driving thru (fast food chain) on that fateful morning you have pains – go into the store – there is blood – go back to the car and drive yourself to the hospital across the street. No time to think – I guess you parked the car and walked into the ER. In the ER you deliver vaginally full term baby. It’s never explained to me (or anyone that can remember) exactly what happened – born dead? Born alive and died? You get to hold the baby, name the baby – fill out all the necessary paperwork. Talk to a grief counselor and tell them you cannot stay at the hospital and will go home. They give you instructions on what to look for (????) and off you go. Wait outside on a park bench for EX (I guess you had the sense to bring in a change of clothes on your trip to the fast food place that morning) 3PM – that’s the time he said he got you on the bench and took you to his place to wait for another family member to pick you up. (maybe it was 4PM - we'll give you another hour)

Your Mother tells the story this way except **** picked you up at the hospital and brought you home – I guess that was around 6:30PM or 7PM and advises all of the above except the baby was born with the cord around his neck and a feint heartbeat. Your Mother advises that you are having the baby cremated. – She is under the impression it was done already. (Father was told it was done already, yet you told others it hadn't been done yet AND that the hospital was taking care of it)

I told your Mother that it’s not possible for all that to have happened and be home at 3. I asked her where the picture of the baby was. The baby’s bracelet, hat, certificate with hand and footprints? I told her that *** got all that when she lost her baby at 5 months. Surely they did that for full term?

I pointed out that you got around quite well 24 hours later for someone losing so much blood – no dizzy spells – sitting on your feet – up and down without any visible discomfort. How about that?? (been a long time since I had a baby, but it's a discomfort I remember well)

I told your Mother how you stopped returning anyone’s calls – so we all stopped trying. But that didn't stop the questions.

I told your Mother how SECRET the whole pregnancy was at first. Only a need to know and only a few at a time. For so happy an occasion it was treated like a spy mission. I mentioned that there were NO ultrasounds being shown to everyone and the only one was a Photoshop ultrasound with no name or date or doctors name on it – just a part of an ultrasound that could have been anyone’s. Your Mother never saw an ultrasound either. You know what she said? She said MAYBE SHE WAS NEVER PREGNANT. Of course we can’t believe your Mother now can we? She’s a drunk and a crazy woman and she never accepted the whole thing anyway because she didn’t like the baby daddy.

We talked about how baby daddy announced to everyone at the shower how this baby was planned with love – as opposed to the “accident” you told everyone in work that it was. I told her I got the impression from him at the shower that this baby was all about him and there isn’t ANY WAY I would believe he would not have been down here even if it was to get his sons remains. I told her I think he knows more than we ever will. And your Mother said – MAYBE SHE WAS NEVER PREGNANT (FOR THE SECOND TIME)

You Mother pointed out that all the shower stuff is still in the front rooms. NOTHING had been done to get the room ready for her “son”. This most wanted child. It was still a computer room that fateful morning. Gifts still sit in boxes and bags.

AND SPEAKING OF THAT MORNING……let’s back up to the prior day when we took you home after you got so violently ill at work. You said your Mother was upstairs getting ready and was taking you to the Doctors. YOUR MOTHER DIDN’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT IT. SHE NEVER TOOK YOU TO THE DOCTORS – AT ANY TIME DURING YOUR PREGNANCY INCLUDING YOUR EMERGENCY ROOM VISIT FOR YOUR BLOOD PRESSURE

That morning your Mother asked if you were going to the Doctors and you said yes AND you TOOK THE DAY OFF FROM WORK. She didn’t know you were officially on Maternity leave as of the day before.

Your Mother is as confused and full of questions as everyone at work. I made no secret of the fact that I’ve had it and can no longer be party to this farce.

Your Mother said that your Family doctor is treating you for anxiety and depression. I believe that is probably true – your are depressed because baby daddy found out you were never pregnant or lost the baby early on and he dumped your ass. You are suffering from anxiety because you dug this hole and don’t know how to get out so you will act indignant and try to make everyone feel bad for doubting you. I told your Mother that she could have cleared everything up with discharge papers from the hospital and a note from the treating physician at the hospital – and if she really WAS seeing a therapist and not some online friend in a chat room she could have gotten a back up note from them as well. NO ONE WOULD HAVE DOUBTED THAT.

I told your Mother how you have changed I told her I didn’t like the person you became over the last two years. I don’t know who you are. You told me early on in your "pregnancy" that you were sure that you would not have a job after the baby was born. I said that was insane. Little did I realize you probably had it all planned out then.

At some point I’ll get over all this bullshit and be able to sleep, but in the meantime I’ll sit and wonder into the night what could possibly make a person do what you did and not think they had to pay?

I gave you every opportunity to say you lost the baby early on - that you had a breakdown - that you didn't know what to do - we all could have accepted and forgiven something so tragic. The person you are now is a deceitful, and manipulative and I think you are now looking for a way to punish everyone for not believing your lies.

I hope you can’t sleep at night.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The upside is I have not been alone with my doubts. Even the father of the child has his doubts. I do know that everyone who was touched by this incident looked into the possibility that we could be wrong. Nothing was ever done to clarify any of it. It was confirmed that no hospital would deliver anyone in an emergency room. It was confirmed that there would be a birth/death certificate - none of which is on record. It was confirmed that there was no record of this person in any hospital on that given day.

And yes - she can sleep at night - quite well - as I hear she is engaged to be married to the father of an old friend.

Staycation

Sunrise - African reserve.

OBVIOUSLY NOT WHERE I AM. sigh.........

Someone coined that name for a stay-at-home vacation. That's what I have been having the past few weeks now. Since I had to use my vacation days (or lose them) I chose to take every Friday off until the end of the year - throw in a Monday here and there and then start fresh next year. It amazes me that people get so upset because you don't take a "vacation". Well - you have to be able to AFFORD a vacation - not just have the time. Times are tough so we are mastering the art of the "staycation".

So - my first Friday I didn't make any real plans to do anything - just play it by ear - run some errands - take care of some personal stuff - maybe sleep in. Well - cancel the sleeping in with two small dogs (with small bladders). Cancel the running errands - it's pouring rain. Who wants to run around outside doing anything? But that's OK - it's a nice lazy day to kick back do nothing and catch up on everything on the DVR. No harm.

Second Friday. Rain again. Forget getting the car washed. You would think with all the damn rain the car would be clean for Gods sake! Another lost Friday. I was beginning to wonder if how I chose my days off was a gift I inherited from my husband who also had bad luck with days off and golf dates.

But this Friday was wonderful - and since I don't have this coming Friday off I had Monday, so I had a 4 day week-end or 2 staycation days. And I was rewarded with two glorious days finally! The Up side to this staying at home has been that I've actually relaxed and not thought about work. I am enjoying my 4 day work weeks immensely. Everyone who knows me knows that I like my job. Doesn't matter that I bitch and complain all the time - that's just my way of venting. There is never any threat that I will go "postal". I don't keep anything bottled up at work. But I do think that a 4 day work week would do everyone in the office good. (Not to mention the $ it could save the management) I bet it could cut back on the Monday/Friday sicknesses. But that could be another blog.


I have decided tho on my official day off there would be a rule - NO housework, nothing that I normally do on the week ends - that my day off would be strictly for me. Now that I've gotten the hang of it I can say without a doubt it is REFRESHING! Don't get me wrong - I would love to take a real vacation, get away someplace on my hit list, but I realize now that I would need a staycation to recover from a vacation, not to mention a second job to cover the costs.